Author Topic: fuckin' shit, isn't it?  (Read 3423 times)

Osbourne Kilminster

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fuckin' shit, isn't it?
« on: December 27, 2009, 08:01:58 PM »
Being single over the festive period sucks. Fuck all to do. Fuck all on the telly. If I had more cash, I'd go out and stand awkwardly in pubs and fucking feel my will crush when a bird checks me out and I dunno what the fuck to do because I haven't been on the pull for about 6 fuckin' years. What an epic crock of shit - all of it, eh? What the fuck do you do? It's boring as fuck. So boring I might look into a secon job or some shit to alleviate the fucking boredom, but then I'd never ever ever get out to do my own shit, would I? No, I'd be right proper fucking stuck working all the bastard time and not getting anywhere with anything or anyone. Fucking shit-hole tiny town as well, so even if I thought I'd hook up with some dirty bird from the fucking net, I can't becase there's no fucker worth looking at in a 50mile radius. Seriously, what do people do? Round here, they just fucking drink and end up fucking shit-faced and wanking into their socks or some shit because they end up fat and full of chips and shit. What the fuck? Gah. No shit, I fucking hate it. Seriously - gay as.

Offline Sinnybuns/Mika

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Re: fuckin' shit, isn't it?
« Reply #1 on: December 27, 2009, 08:09:07 PM »
....I need to kidnap you. 


"Beauty is only skin-deep...ugly goes down to the bone."

Offline Jackson

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Re: fuckin' shit, isn't it?
« Reply #2 on: December 27, 2009, 11:15:48 PM »
I think I just learned enough Brit grammar and slang there to start a new character. Thanks, Ozzy!



Osbourne Kilminster

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Re: fuckin' shit, isn't it?
« Reply #3 on: December 27, 2009, 11:31:37 PM »
I can well see this fuckin' rant going on and fuckin' on like a blog or some kind of continuing soap shit about my epic fails. I hope not, but there ya fucking go. Half past bastard 3 in the morning and I can't sleep because I've been bored into some kind of fucking bullshit half-catatonic gas as shit trance all fucking day. No fucking appetite again either. If I lose weight again this week I'm going to go fucking scizo. Seriously. Sick of it. The whole fucking lot. Stick it, cruel world. I'm the fucking King and one day yuou'll fucking realise it. Haha. Fuck you.

Big Ed Johnson

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Re: fuckin' shit, isn't it?
« Reply #4 on: December 28, 2009, 12:06:06 AM »
Ozzy, not that I'm the kinda guy to laugh at the misfortune of others, I literally blew my moms award-winning potato salad at the monitor... 

Not laughing at your misfortune mate, just laughing at the expressive way you displayed it!!! 

Cheers!!

Offline Jackson

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Re: fuckin' shit, isn't it?
« Reply #5 on: December 28, 2009, 12:45:10 AM »
Jon, you're such a sadist... laughing at his pain.



Osbourne Kilminster

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Re: fuckin' shit, isn't it?
« Reply #6 on: December 28, 2009, 12:47:42 AM »
Some fucker has to.

Offline Sinnybuns/Mika

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Re: fuckin' shit, isn't it?
« Reply #7 on: December 28, 2009, 12:55:00 AM »
Can I just hug ya?  lol.


"Beauty is only skin-deep...ugly goes down to the bone."

V

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Re: fuckin' shit, isn't it?
« Reply #8 on: December 28, 2009, 07:46:18 AM »
you may be single, but you should be getting an honorary Masters in Expletives in the mail in four to six weeks?   

RingOtaku

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Re: fuckin' shit, isn't it?
« Reply #9 on: December 28, 2009, 12:52:16 PM »
But there are so many great things about the Winter Holidays. For instance I bought you the world's smallest violin. Use it to play "My Heart Bleeds For You".

If that doesn't work I got a noose on order from Amazon.co.uk. Look for it in the mail. I told the sender to include instructions so you get it right the first time.

Osbourne Kilminster

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Re: fuckin' shit, isn't it?
« Reply #10 on: December 28, 2009, 01:36:44 PM »
How about you make me a fuckin' instructional DVD, fucktard  :P

RingOtaku

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Re: fuckin' shit, isn't it?
« Reply #11 on: December 28, 2009, 02:35:23 PM »
Because my own small town of fucking boring nothingness is running out of small children for me to exploit.

Offline Sinnybuns/Mika

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Re: fuckin' shit, isn't it?
« Reply #12 on: December 28, 2009, 02:38:21 PM »
You're horrible, Dave.   :D


"Beauty is only skin-deep...ugly goes down to the bone."

Big Ed Johnson

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Re: fuckin' shit, isn't it?
« Reply #13 on: December 28, 2009, 03:01:59 PM »
How about you make me a fuckin' instructional DVD, fucktard  :P

HAHAHAHAHA Ozzy!!!!   Fucking Brilliant!!!!   

But Alas, no dvd for Dave...  For him we got a copy of "The Secret".... 

Osbourne Kilminster

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Re: fuckin' shit, isn't it?
« Reply #14 on: December 30, 2009, 02:07:15 PM »
What the fuck is it about girls, particularly ex-gfs, that makes them think they can pick a fight with you and then turn it on you and be all "leave me alone, I can't cope with the arguing". Like, oh fucking really, you thick shit bitch? Don't fuckign text me your gay-ass little rants because I don't feel completely comfortable being your best fucking friend or whatever shit. Treat me like shit and think I'm going to fucking bend over backwards for you, or maybe bend over forwards so you can fucking ass rape me or whatever? Fuck's sake.

 


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